Healthy Anger

Are you an angry person? I mean, do you get angry easily and often? Do you yell and scream when you’re angry or are you more of the ‘silent treatment’ type of angry person? Or maybe you just pretend you’re not angry and try to ‘grin and bear it’.
I’ve noticed in my Facebook feed lately an ad for being an angry parent. And that concerned me slightly because I know that Facebook is able to customize ads based upon your searches and web history. But I don’t think I’ve searched or visited sites for any anger issues, which leads me to believe Facebook thinks I’m an angry parent. I, honestly, don’t think I am (most of the time anyway).
But I was a very angry child. And my anger came from several sources, but I expressed my anger differently than I do now. Now I tend to internalize it more and pretend everything is okay while I deal with my anger. When I was little, it was much more explosive. For example, I once got so mad at my cousins who were cheating at a game of hide and seek (don’t let them try to tell you differently) that I punched through a window. Yep…hole in glass, blood everywhere and several stitches were the result of my anger.
But God gave me a lot of healing in my anger as I got older, but obviously I still get angry. And the anger really isn’t the problem anyway. In fact, I’ve been learning more and more how anger is a natural response to circumstances and how anger is really there to protect me.
A psalm, written by King David says, “Don’t sin by letting anger control you. Think about it overnight and remain silent.” (4.4, NLT) David seems to allow for our anger as an emotion, but that we shouldn’t let it control us. And that makes a lot of sense to me. I have spent too much of my life allowing anger to control me, leading me down roads that I don’t want to go down (like a stitched arm). I’ve allowed anger to lead me to hurt those close to me. I’ve allowed anger to stop me from seeking forgiveness. I’ve allowed anger to dictate to me too many choices.
And so, I’m sloooowly learning that to control anger, to alleviate its power over me, it starts with accepting it. And I think that’s what David tells us when he writes, ‘think about it overnight.’ He tells us to slow down, accept that we’re angry, reminds us that anger is healthy and understandable and that I can let it go. And it’s not been easy and I don’t ever get it perfect, but I have found anger doesn’t control me like it used to. And I pray you, too, can move forward from your anger. God bless.